Hosea Forgives

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God's Messenger is asked to love and marry a lady of poor reputation

Hosea is commanded to live out a parable in his personal family life

Actors: Hosea dramatizes God's love

Gomer plays the part of God's chosen people

Hosea was a prophet of God in the Old Testament times. He lived during the time of King Hezekiah who had been sick and prayed for a sign that he would get well. The sun dial turned backwards 10 degrees in answer to his prayer. (2 Kings 20) The prophet Isaiah also lived during the time of Hezekiah and Hosea.

 The prophet Hosea also lived during the time of king Jeroboam son of Joash. Jeroboam was the king of Israel  for 41 years. He did evil just like the other Jeroboam son of Nebat. They both had made Israel to sin for many years.

  God's people were worshipping other gods and ignoring heaven. They were offering their own children up as sacrifices. There was terrible wickedness going on among God's people. In desperation to win back their love, God asked Hosea to live out a parable. God sent His dear prophet out to get a wife from among the women who have many lovers. 

The concerns in God's heart had to be great.  He had tried warnings, disasters, and other things to get the attention of His people. He wanted their love and fellowship.

 Now His plan was to make a family that acted like the whole nation. The father was to represent God, the mother would be acting like the people of Israel. The children would copy their mother. This is not what God normally asks His people to do. In other places of the Bible, we are cautioned to be so careful who we choose to live and work with. Realizing this, as a teenager, I spent many hours praying about who the Lord wanted me to marry. I read all I could find in the Bible and in the writings of Ellen White as to what to look for and how to behave myself. I asked God to help me for I did not know the future and what could happen. I wanted my companion to love me for life. I listened to the counsel of my parents and grandparents. The Bible says we need to be careful our partner believes like we do:

1 Corinthians 6:14 Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness? 
6:15 And what concord hath Christ with Belial? or what part hath he that believeth with an infidel? 
6:16 And what agreement hath the temple of God with idols? for ye are the temple of the living God; as God hath said, I will dwell in them, and walk in [them]; and I will be their God, and they shall be my people. 
6:17 Wherefore come out from among them, and be ye separate, saith the Lord, and touch not the unclean [thing]; and I will receive you, 
6:18 And will be a Father unto you, and ye shall be my sons and daughters, saith the Lord Almighty.

 The wife, if she is worldly, will train all the children to do the same. The whole family can be ruined if the wife does not have a deep love for Jesus. So much depends on her. She molds the minds of the children with her influence up to age 12 . The character trends of the child are formed by age two and three. If she is against God, the children will all copy this. They will join each other and bring their friends in a tug of war pulling down anyone who pulls for Jesus.

 Jesus can cause a miracle to happen. He is greater and stronger on His side of the rope. Yet  it is so much more difficult if the child has absolutely no desire for God. They will never be quiet during family worship. They will always act out causing trouble during church meetings. Their hearts are hardened to the work of the Holy Spirit. They keep pulling away from God.

 Hosea went out as God directed, found and and married Gomer. She bore him a son. God named the boy Jezreel. Names had meaning. This child was named in such a way it was a prophecy that the house of Israel would be scattered. Other people in the Bible had names that prophesied an event. Methuselah meant that when he died the flood would come.
To attract the attention of other men, Gomer painted up her face and wore jewels.  Where did she get the money to buy all these jewels? Did the prophet Hosea give her an allowance? I wonder where the money came from.

She did get a lot of attention and loved it. She thought she was having a great life. She did not know it was all empty and would not bring her inner peace and happiness.

Gomer was dressed for success in attracting men.
She wore ear rings and jewelry and totally forgot about God. (Hosea 2:13)  In Jeremiah 4:30, God said that when His people were spoiled, they would wear their ornaments and paint their faces trying to make themselves beautiful on the outside.


Some pay thousands of dollars for a rock or a string of pearls It becomes a source of pride while it hangs on the outside. 
Many wear rings on their fingers and like all to notice it. Real beauty is not outward decorations of gold or pretty clothes or painting of the face. Real joy and beauty comes from helping others. It comes from a meek and quiet unselfish spirit. This beauty gives the face a glow. There is a bubbly joy and love that is ready to help and share. Such ornaments of character are priceless. (1 Peter 3:3 and 1 Timothy 2:9-12)

I have seen many wearing wedding rings that are unfaithful to their marriage promise. I do not believe that the ring shows a determination to be faithful. 

 While she was doing these things,  Hosea's wife Gomer had another baby. This baby girl was named by God also. The name God chose was Lo-ruhamah which meant He would no longer have forgiveness and compassion for all the people of Israel.  Can you imagine a name that meant there was no longer forgiveness or compassion? Would you want a name like that?
 When the third child was born, God named that one too. He was to be called "not my people" Lo-ammi.
Imagine Hosea telling people the names of his wife's children: 

This boy is "Israel will be destroyed"; 

and this one is "no longer any forgiveness"; 

and this boy is "not my people".

Kind loving Hosea was heart broken. He had given his wife all she needed. She spent her money on things to attract other men. She gave her love to others and not him. He had loved her dearly but she kept looking for other lovers.
Hosea asked the children to plead with their mother to be faithful. He told the children he was not really their father. He said their mother had many other lovers. Again and again the prophet Hosea tried to get his wife to love only him. However in spite of all his love, she kept going out to other men. There was such sadness in the home. The poor prophet Hosea was showing the whole nation a parable of how God felt about the nation praying to idols. They were doing the same thing to God that Gomer did to her husband. They were breaking God's loving heart. Today people are selfishly going after idols of toys, computer games, fancy cars, houses, wealth, fame, pictures of naked people, gang activities, drugs, and they need God's love. 

God is pleading. God uses His prophets, His missionaries, His preachers, His friends to plead with the sinners.

Kind loving Hosea tried taking his wife to a special setting. He spoke sweet kind and loving words to her. He did everything to woo her heart to loving only him.  She again left for other men. 



Many people who want to express love,  choose to send a gorgeous bouquet of red roses. The fragrance and the color and how they look is an expression of love from the depths of the heart. 

Perhaps the prophet Hosea gave Gomer flowers, the Bible does not give us a clue. Yet he did all he could think of to win her love. He probably was very helpful making the home a special place for her, helping with the care of the children and home cleaning. I am sure he lifted her load of care in any way he could. He probably even offered to help cooking meals.

Another way to express love is to tell the lady how special she looks and buy her the fragrance to wear that she likes best.

 That is the way God is. He does everything He can think of to win your heart.

She left the comforts of her home and stayed with other men. Finally one day she hit the end of her resources. She had probably sold all her jewels just to survive. She must have been sick or not as attractive anymore. The only value she had was to be sold as a slave. Perhaps the beauty of her youth was gone and she could not attract any more lovers. She was up for sale. She was not worth 30 shekels that a male slave would bring. It seems no one wanted to buy her. 
The price on her was 15 shekels. In her mind, maybe she worried. What  if no one bought her? How could she have money to eat? The Bible does not say who was selling her.
She must have felt worthless standing there for sale.


The Bible says she wished to go back to her first husband because things were so much better there. (Hosea 1:7) She had tasted the bitterness and ugliness and emptiness of sin. Now that she was at the bottom, she started to wish for her husband because things were better at his home.
In her desperate need, God sent her husband, the Godly prophet Hosea, to the market to buy his wife back. There she was standing alone in her shame, for sale like a slave. She did not look elegant or dignified. She was being sold as though there really was no value to her. He felt sorry that she was so ashamed. He loved her and did not want her to be thrown away as worthless. Now, I can assure you, most men would have hated her by now.  That is forgiving love. That kind of love only comes out of heaven. You won't find that kind very easy on this earth. It is only in the hearts of those who want to be like Jesus. Hosea was acting out what God does for every sinner. This whole story was a real life drama for what happens every day as God forgives and tries to win people to love Him. It breaks His gentle heart of love when we turn from Him and stubbornly keep on loving sin.
Hosea paid 15 shekels and some barley for her. Jesus paid with His life by dying on the cross. Hosea could have offered less for her and probably no one else would have bought her but that would have told her she was worth nothing now to him. Because he bought her, he showed he still saw value in her. Like God he was not willing to see her discarded as garbage. Because God does not force Himself on others, He waits till sinners see that they need Him.
With  the miracle of perfect love from God this dear Godly man Hosea again showered this undeserving lady Gomer with his tender love. This was not ever done in his culture.  He was going against all customs. A woman doing as Gomer had done would have been stoned. Today she would have been divorced and denounced in the society of the prophet as a wicked woman and banished from the church. You can imagine his actions shocked the whole nation.

Gomer had cost him a lot and showed no gratitude. She had harmed the prophet's reputation. She had hurt him over and over and still he loved her. Only Godly people can love like that. It is not easy to forgive the sin of adultery. It hurts so deeply because the faithful partner feels rejected and abandoned. Abandonment brings deeper sorrow and agony than English words can describe.  The grief feels like the partner died yet the pain continues because they continue rejecting. It is hard to keep hoping. I do not know how many years this story drug on for poor prophet Hosea. It had to be more than 10-15 years because he tried to get the children to plead with their mother to return.  After 25 years of repeated injuries, the scars increase the difficulty of a normal sweet trusting relationship. Sin though forgiven, has consequences. The children may be totally lost. Their anger and frustration can build and affect all their own relationships.  In addition, there is always that fear that the partner is pretending and will soon cause pain again.

  It is not natural in this old world of sin to pour out love on one so undeserving and unthankful for so many years. WE cannot in our own hearts forgive and love like the Godly prophet Hosea.  Forgiving seventy times seven is not easy. It is God's miracle to those who want to live like Jesus. Some of the scars will last forever until the healing happens at the tree of life in heaven. God loves even when He's been hurt. THAT IS THE WAY GOD IS. THAT IS MERCY AND GRACE.

From God, the love flows freely as if the sin had never happened. God never forgets anything. But He says He chooses to remember our sins no more. He puts them in the bottom of the sea when we ask for forgiveness and for help to change. That is amazing. He surrounds us with good things. He makes gorgeous flowers, trees, bird songs, children smiling and  laughing, good flavors in foods. Oh, what a special loving heart He has!

His promises are leaves from the tree of life that can now begin the healing process. 

All sinners are like Hosea's wife. We  tell Him we love Him then fall into temptation. When we hit bottom and wish for God, He is ready to forgive and shower  with love. What a great God we have! I want to be just like Him, don't you? I want my Father's eyes. How I wish I had His kind of love.

  I would be thrilled if some day someone looked into my eyes and said, "your eyes look like your Father's eyes". When I have my Father's eyes, I will see value in the bullies, the cruel harsh people and in the poor cast out ones around me. I will shower them with love, respect and honor as though they were the most precious, educated and wealthy in the world. It is easier just to love those who are loving.



This story opens up many questions about divorce and how to deal with marriage problems.

The next section gives more on adultery and what God says for punishment, and what can be done. This section will be more interesting to adults than little children.

What is right in God's eyes? What is the punishment for adultery? death

 Is there any hope for the sinner? The book of Hosea gives hope for the sinner.

The sinner can be saved from sins 

but not while stubbornly continuing in sin

Are there promises?

Are there suggestions how to win back the estranged sinning spouse?

Read on to find these good things. Suggestions are made in addition to Bible and Spirit of Prophecy counsels

These advice comments are near the end and come from people who have been married more than 30 years.

Promises for the bruised:

Isaiah 54:4 Fear not; for thou shalt not be ashamed: neither be thou confounded; for thou shalt not be put to shame: for thou shalt forget the shame of thy youth, and shalt not remember the reproach of thy widowhood any more. 

"Fear not, "He says; "thy Maker is thine husband; the Lord of hosts is His name, and thy Redeemer, the Holy One of Israel." "Turn, O backsliding children, saith the Lord; for I am married unto you." Isaiah 54:4, 5; Jeremiah 3:14. In the "Song of Songs" we hear the bride's voice saying, "My Beloved is mine, and I am His." And He who is to her "the chiefest among ten thousand," speaks to His chosen one. "Thou art all fair, My love; there is no spot in thee." Song of Solomon 2:16; 5:10; 4:7. 

Caution: Lock within your own hearts the knowledge of each other's faults. Tell your troubles alone to God. He can give you right counsel and sure consolation which will be pure, having no bitterness in it. {AH 337.3}

Thy Maker is thy husband; 
Jehovah of hosts is His name: 
And the Holy One of Israel is thy Redeemer; 
The God of the whole earth shall He be called." Is. 54: 4,5,

"Leave thy fatherless children, I will preserve them alive; 
And let thy widows trust in Me." 
Psalm 68:5; Jeremiah 49:11. {MH 202.1}
Many a father, when called upon to part from his loved ones, has died resting in faith upon God's promise to care for them. The Lord provides for the widow and the fatherless, not by a miracle in sending manna from heaven, not by sending ravens to bring them food; but by a miracle upon human hearts, expelling selfishness, and unsealing the fountains of Christlike love. The afflicted and bereaved ones He commits to His followers as a precious trust. They have the very strongest claim upon our sympathy. {MH 202.2} Ministry of Healing  by Ellen White
In homes supplied with life's comforts, in bins and granaries filled with the yield of abundant harvests, in warehouses stocked with the products of the loom, and vaults stored with gold and silver, God has supplied means for the sustenance of these needy ones. He calls upon us to be channels of His bounty. 

Many a widowed mother with her fatherless children is bravely striving to bear her double burden, often toiling far beyond her strength in order to keep her little ones with her and to provide for their needs. Little time has she for their training and instruction, little opportunity to surround them with influences that would brighten their lives. She needs encouragement, sympathy, and tangible help. {MH 203.1}
God calls upon us to supply to these children, so far as we can, the want of a father's care. Instead of standing aloof, complaining of their faults, and of the trouble they may cause, help them in every way possible. Seek to aid the careworn mother. Lighten her burdens. {MH 203.2}

What God says about how He feels about adultery

God says those who keep the commandments will be in heaven. Rev. 14:12

Revelation 22:14 Blessed [are] they that do his commandments, that they may have right to the tree of life, and may enter in through the gates into the city. 
22:15 For without [are] dogs, and sorcerers, and whoremongers, and murderers, and idolaters, and whosoever loveth and maketh a lie.  (whoremongers are those committing adultery in any form open or hidden)

Ephesians 5:5 For this ye know, that no whoremonger, nor unclean person, nor covetous man, who is an idolater, hath any inheritance in the kingdom of Christ and of God. 

The commandment on adultery says:  Exodus 20:14 Thou shalt not commit adultery.

Jesus says that even thinking the thoughts in the heart is the actual sin of adultery.

 Mathew 5:27 Ye have heard that it was said by them of old time, Thou shalt not commit adultery: 
5:28 But I say unto you, That whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her hath committed adultery with her already in his heart. 

This means that even those things done in secret are seen and judged by God. Those who are  looking at pictures of naked people doing sinful things is judged wicked by God. It is the sin of adultery. Those who read wicked books are doing just like Gomer. Those who do recreational reading of books or internet material on the fun of hurting and abusing children are more guilty for the pain and suffering continues throughout their lifetime. God says it would be better that a millstone had been hung about their necks and they be cast into the sea.

They may hide their sin and act like they are clean and holy but inside they are under judgment and bring great suffering on the faithful partner. If they had the opportunity they would do as their imaginations desire. They cannot hide their sins from God. And very little can be hidden from the partner. Their attitudes betray their sins. There is no genuine love, care, and nurturing possible when their hearts are empty.

God has no pleasure in the death of anyone. He cries out of the anguish of His heart. These cries are like those of a lover who's spouse has turned away to love others. He pleads for return of affection. The more He is refused, the harder the heart becomes in the sinner until they will never listen. 

Ezekiel 33:11 Say unto them, [As] I live, saith the Lord GOD, I have no pleasure in the death of the wicked; but that the wicked turn from his way and live: turn ye, turn ye from your evil ways; for why will ye die, O house of Israel? 

Said the True Witness to the church at Ephesus: "I have somewhat against thee, because thou hast left thy first love. Remember therefore from whence thou art fallen, and repent, and do the first works; or else I will come unto thee quickly, and will remove thy candlestick out of his place, except thou repent." Revelation 2:4, 5. The Savior watches for a response to His offers of love and forgiveness, with a more tender compassion than that which moves the heart of an earthly parent to forgive a wayward, suffering son. He cries after the wanderer, "Return unto Me, and I will return unto you." Malachi 3:7. But if the erring one persistently refuses to heed the voice that calls him with pitying, tender love, he will at last be left in darkness. The heart that has long slighted God's mercy, becomes hardened in sin, and is no longer susceptible to the influence of the grace of God. Fearful will be the doom of that soul of whom the pleading Savior shall finally declare, he "is joined to idols: let him alone." Hosea 4:17. It will be more tolerable in the day of judgment for the cities of the plain than for those who have known the love of Christ, and yet have turned away to choose the pleasures of a world of sin. {PP 165.2}
The law of Moses said:

Deuteronomy 22:23 If a damsel [that is] a virgin be betrothed unto an husband, and a man find her in the city, and lie with her; 
22:24 Then ye shall bring them both out unto the gate of that city, and ye shall stone them with stones that they die; the damsel, because she cried not, [being] in the city; and the man, because he hath humbled his neighbour's wife: so thou shalt put away evil from among you. 

What should a couple do if they have already acted like man and wife though not yet  married?
Deuteronomy 22:28 If a man find a damsel [that is] a virgin, which is not betrothed, and lay hold on her, and lie with her, and they be found; 
22:29 Then the man that lay with her shall give unto the damsel's father fifty [shekels] of silver, and she shall be his wife; because he hath humbled her, he may not put her away all his days. 

Does God say it is ok to divorce for unfaithfulness?

Mathew 19:4 And he answered and said unto them, Have ye not read, that he which made [them] at the beginning made them male and female, 
19:5 And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh? 
19:6 Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder. 
19:7 They say unto him, Why did Moses then command to give a writing of divorcement, and to put her away? 
19:8 He saith unto them, Moses because of the hardness of your hearts suffered you to put away your wives: but from the beginning it was not so. 

19:9 And I say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife, except [it be] for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery: and whoso marrieth her which is put away doth commit adultery. 
19:10 His disciples say unto him, If the case of the man be so with [his] wife, it is not good to marry. 

Was Hosea full of hardness of heart? 

Moses because of the hardness of your hearts suffered you to put away your wives

More advice over divorce problems. God says the divorce remedy is only for the sin of adultery.
God gave only one cause why a wife should leave her husband, or the husband leave his wife, which was adultery. Let this ground be prayerfully considered. {AH 342.2} Adventist Home
Still Married in God's Sight, Although Divorced.-- A woman may be legally divorced from her husband by the laws of the land and yet not divorced in the sight of God and according to the higher law. There is only one sin, which is adultery, which can place the husband or wife in a position where they can be free from the marriage vow in the sight of God. Although the laws of the land may grant a divorce, yet they are husband and wife still in the Bible light, according to the laws of God. {AH 344.2}
Separation From an Unbelieving Companion.--If the wife is an unbeliever and an opposer, the husband cannot, in view of the law of God, put her away on this ground alone. In order to be in harmony with the law of Jehovah, he must abide with her unless she chooses of herself to depart. He may suffer opposition and be oppressed and annoyed in many ways; he will find his comfort and his strength and support from God, who is able 
to give grace for every emergency. He should be a man of pure mind, of truly decided, firm principles, and God will give him wisdom in regard to the course which he should pursue. Impulse will not control his reason, but reason will hold the lines of control in her firm hand, that lust shall be held under bit and bridle. {AH 344.4}
A husband and wife should cultivate respect and affection for each other. They should guard the spirit, the words, and the actions so that nothing will be said or done to irritate or annoy. Each is to have a care for the other, doing all in their power to strengthen their mutual affection. {AH 345.3}
I tell you both to seek the Lord. In love and kindness do your duty one to the other. The husband should cultivate industrious habits, doing his best to support his family. This will lead his wife to have respect for him. . . . {AH 345.4}
My sister, you cannot please God by maintaining your present attitude. Forgive your husband. He is your husband, and you will be blessed in striving to be a dutiful, affectionate wife. Let the law of kindness be on your lips. You can and must change your attitude. {AH 345.5}
You must both study how you can assimilate, instead of differing, with one another. . . . The use of mild, gentle methods will make a surprising difference in your lives. {AH 345.6}Adventist Home by Ellen White
Adultery, Divorce, and Church Membership.--In regard to the case of the injured sister, A.G., we would say in reply to the questions of ----- that it is a feature in the cases of most who have been overtaken in sin, as her husband has, that they have no real sense of their villainy. Some, however, do and are restored to the church, but not till they have merited the confidence of the people of God by unqualified confessions and a period of sincere repentance. This case presents difficulties not found in some, and we would add only the following: {AH 346.1}
1. In cases of the violation of the seventh commandment where the guilty party does not manifest true repentance, if the injured party can obtain a divorce without making their own cases and that of their children, if they have them, worse by so doing, they should be free. {AH 346.2}
2. If they would be liable to place themselves and their children in worse condition by a divorce, we know of no scripture that would make the innocent party guilty by remaining. {AH 346.3}

3. Time and labor and prayer and patience and faith and a godly life might work a reform. To live with one who has broken the marriage vows and is covered all over with the disgrace and shame of guilty love, and realizes it not, is an eating canker to the soul; and yet a divorce is a lifelong, heartfelt sore. God pity the innocent party! Marriage should be considered well before contracted. {AH 346.4}
4. Why! oh, why! will men and women who might be respectable and good and reach heaven at last sell themselves to the devil so cheap, wound their bosom friends, disgrace their families, bring a reproach upon
the cause, and go to hell at last? God have mercy! Why will not those who are overtaken in crime manifest repentance proportionate to the enormity of their crime and fly to Christ for mercy and heal, as far as possible, the wounds they have made? {AH 346.5}
{AH 347.1}

If the spouse refuses to confess the sin, continues to hide things, and expresses no sorrow over the the wounds inflicted by the sin, but instead blames the spouse there is NO genuine repentance yet. Keep on praying and doing all you can to demonstrate God's love.

If there is continual undermining of the reputation and respect of you, the spouse, keep on praying and asking Jesus to unite His mighty prayers with yours.

 If there is continued discarding and abandonment emotionally  and  if they do not move away,  keep on asking God for a soft heart of mercy. Sing of the love of Jesus as you do things to make the home special.  Jesus can fill your heart with so much joy that you will not even think of depending on your spouse for that fulfillment and sense of value. Jesus can give you jobs of reaching out to others sharing the gospel, helping the poor. Your life can be like a watered garden no matter how you are treated. Hosea seemed to have that.

Here are some promises to the one trying to love like Jesus, something to hang onto during the painful days of being rejected.  Set aside your anger and ask Jesus to give you a soft heart. Remember God does never leave you or reject you. He can be a husband to you. He can so fill your hearts desires that you will not even long for what Satan has taken from you when he caused your spouse to fall. All you will long for is the salvation of a soul very precious to God. The God of heaven made your spouse and is just as full of desire to save your spouse as He is you. God does not pick sides. He wants to save the sinner not the sin. Love the sinner in spite of the bad habits. Look past the faults.  Pretend like you are taking off the sin like a coat and looking only at the sinner with the loving forgiving eyes of the Father in heaven.

 God takes pity in your pain and struggle to win the heart back. Don't give up. He will help you. Here is a promise, then more suggestions.

 " Time and labor and prayer and patience and faith and a godly life might work a reform. To live with one who has broken the marriage vows and is covered all over with the disgrace and shame of guilty love, and realizes it not, is an eating canker to the soul; and yet a divorce is a lifelong, heartfelt sore. God pity the innocent party!" Adventist Home 346
Remedies for those forgiving and waiting for God's miracles to happen. (You can ask for but don't expect overnight service when working with hearts. Sometimes it takes 30-50 years)  It took Daniel 21 days of fasting and praying and sack cloth and ashes before Jesus Himself turned the heart of the stubborn king. They began working on the project immediately as he began praying.  It seems it took Hosea many years and many efforts to get Gomer back. Trust in Jesus at all times:

Focus on helping others and being positive. Don't allow anger and grief to end your life of helpfulness to others.

In Zephaniah 3:17 it says God sings about you. Why not ask Him to teach you the song He has composed about your spouse? Then sing it to your spouse. Ask God for the perfect moment for the estranged partner to hear the new composition. 

Think about the things that attracted you to them in the first place.

Focus on positive traits

Cook up favorite foods

Do favorite things (if they are in keeping with God's standards only)

Try to imagine what Jesus would do. Forget your own reputation even if you get blamed for their sin. God knows and He is in charge of HIS reputation. You belong to Him. He will defend.

Never give up doing God's work because of their opposition. It may be Satan's plan to stop your missionary work by getting the spouse to fall into sin and stay there opposing you for years. Seek first the kingdom of God. God will move all barriers.

God's PROMISES solve my problems:

Cast thy burden upon the Lord, and he shall sustain thee. Ps. 55:22

Remember, my dear brother and sister, that God is love and that by His grace you can succeed in making each other happy, as in your marriage pledge you promised to do. {AH 112.3}

Lock within your own hearts the knowledge of each other's faults. Tell your troubles alone to God. He can give you right counsel and sure consolation which will be pure, having no bitterness in it. {AH 337.3}

I beseech you to bring yourselves under God's control. When tempted to speak provokingly, refrain from saying anything. AH 342

The Lord understands all about your experiences. . . . Be of good courage in the Lord; He will not leave you nor forsake you. My heart goes out in tenderest sympathy for you. {AH 343.4}

Health.--Doing good is an excellent remedy for disease. Those who engage in the work are invited to call upon God, and He has pledged Himself to answer them. Their soul shall be satisfied in drouth, and they shall be like a watered garden, whose waters fail not.--Testimonies, vol. 2, p. 29.

In fellowship with God, with Christ, and with holy angels, they are surrounded with a heavenly atmosphere, an atmosphere that brings health to the body, vigor to the intellect, and joy to the soul.--Testimonies, vol. 6, p. 306. {ChS 271.1}

Obstacles, opposition, and bitter, heartbreaking discouragements, the worker will have to meet. He may not see the fruit of his toil. But in face of all this he finds in his labor a blessed recompense. All who surrender themselves to God in unselfish service for humanity are in cooperation with the Lord of glory. This thought sweetens all toil, it braces the will, it nerves the spirit for whatever may befall.--Testimonies, vol. 6, pp. 305, 306. {ChS 270.5}

The condition of society presents a sad comment upon Heaven's ideal of this sacred relation. Yet even for those who have found bitterness and disappointment where they had hoped for companionship and joy, the gospel of Christ offers a solace. {AH 100.3}

The patience and gentleness which His Spirit can impart, will sweeten the bitter lot. The heart in which Christ dwells will be so filled, so satisfied, with His love that it will not be consumed with longing to attract sympathy and attention to itself. And through the surrender of the soul to God, His wisdom can accomplish what human wisdom fails to do. Through the revelation of His grace, hearts that were once indifferent or estranged may be united. . . . {AG 115.4}
Men and women can reach God's ideal for them if they will take Christ as their helper. What human wisdom cannot do, His grace will accomplish for those who give themselves to Him in loving trust. His providence can unite hearts in bonds that are of heavenly origin. Love will not be a mere exchange of soft and flattering words. The loom of heaven weaves with warp and woof finer, yet more firm, than can be woven by the looms of earth. The result is not a tissue fabric, but a texture that will bear wear and test and trial. Heart will be bound to heart in the golden bonds of a love that is enduring. {AG 115.5} Amazing Grace

"What good can she do? What benefit is it to her children for her to remain at home? She has felt an earnest desire to do some work in the Lord's vineyard and has thought that it might be best to leave her family rather than to remain while the husband and father is constantly teaching the children to disrespect and disobey her. {AH 348.1}
In such cases my advice would be, Mothers, whatever trials you may be called to endure through poverty, through wounds and bruises of the soul, from the harsh, overbearing assumption of the husband and father, do not leave your children; do not give them up to the influence of a godless father. Your work is to counteract the work of the father, who is apparently under the control of Satan. 
Let your husband see the Holy Spirit working in you. Be careful and considerate, patient and forbearing. Do not urge the truth upon him. Do your duty as a wife should, and then see if his heart is not touched. Your affections must not be weaned from your husband. Please him in every way possible. Let not your religious faith draw you apart. Conscientiously obey God, and please your husband wherever you can. . . . {AH 349.2}
Let all see that you love Jesus and trust in Him. Give your husband and your believing and unbelieving friends evidence that you desire them to see the beauty of truth. But do not show that painful, worrying anxiety which often spoils a good work. . . . {AH 349.3}
Never let a word of reproach or faultfinding fall upon the ears of your husband. You sometimes pass through strait places, but do not talk of these trials. Silence is eloquence. Hasty speech will only increase your unhappiness. Be cheerful and happy. Bring all the sunshine possible into your home, and shut out the shadows. Let the bright beams of the Sun of Righteousness shine into the chambers of your soul temple. Then the fragrance of the Christian life will be brought into your family. There will be no dwelling upon disagreeable things, which many times have no truth in them. 
{AH 349.4}
A Burdened Wife Counseled to Keep Cheerful.-- You now have a double responsibility because your husband has turned his face away from Jesus. . . . {AH 350.1}
I know it must be a great grief for you to stand alone, as far as the doing of the word is concerned. But how knowest thou, O wife, but that your consistent life of faith and obedience may win back your husband to the truth? Let the dear children be brought to Jesus. In simple language speak the words of truth to them. Sing to them pleasant, attractive songs which reveal the love of Christ. Bring your children to Jesus, for He loves little children. {AH 350.2}
Keep cheerful. Do not forget that you have a Comforter, the Holy Spirit, which Christ has appointed. You are never alone. If you will listen to the voice that now speaks to you, if you will respond without delay to the knocking at the door of your heart, "Come in, Lord Jesus, that I may sup with Thee, and Thee with me," the heavenly Guest will enter. When this element, which is all divine, abides with you, there is peace and rest. {AH 350.3}
Maintain Christian Principles.--The household where God is not worshiped is like a ship in the midst of the sea without a pilot or a helm. The tempest beats and breaks upon it, and there is danger that all on board may perish. Regard your life and the lives of your children as precious for Christ's sake, for you must meet them and your husband before the throne of God. Your steadfast Christian principles must not become weak, but stronger and stronger. However much your husband may be annoyed, however strongly he may oppose you, you must show a consistent, faithful, Christian steadfastness. And then whatever he may say, in heart and judgment he can but respect you, if he has a heart of flesh. 
{AH 350.4}
God's Claims to Come First.

She should remember that her marriage does not destroy her individuality. God has claims upon her higher than any earthly claim. Christ has bought her with His own blood. She is not her own. She fails to put her entire trust in God and submits to yield her convictions, her conscience, to an overbearing, tyrannical man, fired up by Satan whenever his satanic majesty can work effectually through him to intimidate this trembling, shrinking soul. She has so many times been thrown into agitation that her nervous system is shattered, and she is merely a wreck. Is it the will of the Lord that this sister should be in this state and God be robbed of her service? No. Her marriage was a deception of the devil. Yet now she should make the best of it, treat her husband with tenderness, and make him as happy as she can without violating her conscience; for if he remains in his rebellion, this world is all the heaven he will have. But to deprive herself of the privilege of meetings, to gratify an overbearing husband possessing the spirit of the dragon, is not according to God's will. {AH 351.1}

I once heard of a sweet Godly woman who got up from her bed combed her hair and prepared a banquet prepared for a king. The king was her drunken husband who demanded food for himself and his friend. at 2 in the morning. The friend left before the food was ready. He was embarrassed. The drunken husband asked her why she was so sweet to him. He expected anger yet she gave love.

She sweetly answered that she wanted to make this world the best heaven possible for him for that was all he was going to get as long as he continued in sin. Her influence on him saved him. Her kindness turned his heart to God.